


Doesn't Happen Twice

by marrjoram



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Blow Jobs, Future Fic, Language, M/M, Minor Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-28
Updated: 2014-03-28
Packaged: 2018-01-17 09:30:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1382473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marrjoram/pseuds/marrjoram
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shūzō could be called a lot of things, but stupid usually wasn’t one of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Doesn't Happen Twice

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how this happened (I know who to blame, though ♥).  
> The fic's unbeta'ed, so I apologize for any mistakes.  
> Actually, I apologize for the whole thing. I'm sorry /o\

Shūzō could be called a lot of things, but stupid usually wasn’t one of them. Sure, his temper was still a bit short from time to time, but he was an adult now, he could act like one.

So what the hell was he doing. He wasn’t even drunk. Clearly this was insanity, no two ways about it. He looked up and saw Haizaki’s ass, swaying obscenely as he climbed the stairs. He had to be doing that on purpose. It was disgusting. God, _what_ was Shūzō thinking, coming here.

Here, to Haizaki’s place. To have sex with him. Shūzō wished he was drunk, that would make at least a little more sense.

They reached the top of the stairs. Haizaki turned left and started digging through his pockets, probably looking for the keys. Shūzō followed him to the end of the corridor. The building was seedy as hell. It stank of cat piss and stale tobacco smoke. It was probably full of cockroaches, too. Shūzō shuddered. He wanted to tell Haizaki to hurry up with the goddamn keys, but when he looked at Haizaki’s face and saw his smirk he changed his mind.

Shūzō’d started having second thoughts, and third and fourth, as soon as they’d stepped off the train. Earlier, even. When Haizaki had let go of his wrists and said “Let’s go to my place”. But he hadn’t argued then. He thought he might now, though. Because this whole thing’d stopped feeling surreal and ridiculous. Now it felt ridiculous and dangerously stupid. He wasn’t even that horny anymore, even though the memory of Haizaki’s grip tight around his wrists made his dick, still a little hard from all the back alley groping, twitch in his pants.

By the door Haizaki’s cursing was getting louder. Shūzō looked at him. He was tall now, almost as tall as Shūzō. His weird hair was buzzed off. The cut on his lower lip was still bleeding a little. He looked like a goddamn mobster. Suddenly Shūzō realized he could actually _be_ one.

Hell, he hadn’t seen Haizaki since he’d graduated from middle school. It was over six years already. He didn’t know the guy anymore. He hadn’t even known him all that well back at Teikō. Haizaki had been bad news back then, who knew what he got up to nowadays.

Yeah, no. Shūzō really wasn’t horny at all anymore. He also wasn’t going into that apartment, even if it looked like Haizaki finally found his keys and was already opening the door. He wasn’t that hard up for it, he didn’t owe Haizaki anything, and it wasn’t like his pride would suffer if he changed his mind and refused to go through with this dumb thing. The opposite, even. Also, he knew, if he went inside, he would cave and then most likely regret it forever.

So instead of accepting Haizaki’s silent invitation and following him inside, Shūzō took a few steps back and said “Look, thanks and all but I don’t think this is such a great idea after all. “

Even before he finished speaking, Shūzō saw Haizaki’s expression turn from smarmy to sour.

“Aww, Senpai, don’t be like that,” he drawled, his mouth twisted in a nasty grin. “I figured it would take at least my hand on your dick for you to try and turn tail. Don’t disappoint me and fucking freak out before we even do anything.”

Shūzō really hoped he wasn’t going to get punched for this. “That’s the thing – I’m not your damn senpai anymore. We’re practically strangers,” he said through clenched teeth. “So, this is a stupid idea. I’m gonna go now.”

Haizaki’s grimace turned even nastier. Which was actually quite a feat. “Thanks for fucking wasting my time, then,” he spat. Then he simply turned around and walked into the apartment, slamming the door behind him.

Shūzō stood there, dumbfounded, for a couple of minutes. He’d expected more argument from Haizaki. Or a punch. But Haizaki didn’t come back. That, it seemed, was it.

Shūzō called for a taxi and went home.

***

“What a rude piece of shit,” Shūzō muttered under his breath. He was supposed to be studying, he had an exam in a couple of days. But he couldn’t stop thinking about last Friday. The bruise he could swear he still felt on his shoulder, where Haizaki’d bitten him, made his pulse race every time he touched it.

It wasn’t like Shūzō had never thought about doing it with a guy. He found some guys attractive, but so what. There were all kinds of temptations people had in their life. A smart person could easily figure out which were the safe ones, and which weren’t.

Shūzō had definitely never thought to act on _that_ particular one. But then he’d gone right ahead and done something stupid. With Haizaki, of all people.

Haizaki, who maybe once had been a good basketball player, but who’d also had a shit ton of issues. And that was all Shūzō had ever known about him.

He didn’t know about basketball now, but it seemed the issues part was still true. Probably even worse that it had been in middle school.

So how on earth had he ended up getting groped by Haizaki that night. When he’d left the restaurant after the gōkon and walked in on a fight he hadn’t even recognized Haizaki. But he’d been able to still hear the footsteps of that other guys retreating in the alley and Haizaki’d already had Shūzō backed up against a wall and his tongue in Shūzō’s mouth. Things had gone downhill from there.

It didn’t matter that he felt like an idiot every time he remembered how things had gone that night. What was done was done. And maybe he still got a little hard when he thought about it, whatever. He refused to jerk off to it, it would go away soon.

***

This was it. He was actually insane. It was late afternoon and here he was, standing in front of Haizaki’s apartment. He was probably getting reported right this moment, because he’d been trying to knock on the door for quite some time now, and couldn’t. Haizaki’s neighbors had to had noticed him.

And Hazaki probably even wasn’t inside. It was getting dark, so maybe he was out racketeering, or something. Damn, Shūzō was such an asshole. He’d spent all of two minutes with the guy and had already made him into a Yakuza. What was he even trying to accomplish, coming here. He had no idea. He was totally being led around by his dick.

Because of course it hadn’t gone away. Also, he couldn’t stop thinking about what could have happened if he’d stayed that night. He totally didn’t care anymore, he had to know or he was going to go mad for real this time.

Now he just had to knock on that damn door, before the police did actually take him away, or worse. The neighborhood didn’t look like its occupants turned to the authorities when they had problems. It looked more like they might turn to stabbing the source of their problems and be done with it.

So he knocked, and had to knock a second time, because even he couldn’t hear the first one, and he was actually the one doing it.

It turned out Haizaki was home. He opened the door saying something, but when he recognized Shūzō he stopped, his eyes wide. “What? Senpai? Fuck! What are you doing here?” Well, he definitely hadn’t expected Shūzō to show up.

“I, ah, came to. Talk. I mean, to…” Shūzō should have prepared better for this.

“Oh, okay. Come in and close the door.” Haizaki was already retreating inside the apartment. It was impossible to see his face. Shūzō followed him and shut the door.

The apartment was tiny, but in the genkan it had an actual shoebox and a wall coat hanger. It was surprising.

Since the shoebox was full, Shūzō left his boots on the floor. He debated whether he should take off his coat, too, but in the end decided not to.

He went further into the apartment. It really was very small, and also nothing like what Shūzō’d imagined. It had a table with a couple of chairs in the middle, a dresser, a bed and a few bookshelves in one corner, and a kitchen annex with a few cupboards, a hot plate stove and a refrigerator in the opposite one. There was also another door, probably leading to the bathroom.

It was a tidy and well organized space. There were a couple of empty beer bottles on the table, next to an old but decent-looking PC monitor. But that was it. No stacks of black garbage bags stuffed full everywhere, no dead insects on the floor. The building itself looked nasty, but Haizaki’s place was clean, it could even be called cozy and it wouldn’t be a stretch.

Haizaki was standing at the stove, stirring something in a pot. He glanced at Shūzō and said “I’d take that off if I were you. This place gets really fucking hot when I turn this shit on,” he gestured vaguely at the stove.

And it really was hot. Shūzō noticed Haizaki was only wearing a t-shirt and a worn pair of sweatpants. He was also barefoot. Huh. Shūzō hurried back to the door and hung his coat on the wall.

When he got back, Haizaki was taking the pot off the stove. “Okay, I’m done. I didn’t want this to burn while we _talked_ ,” he put an emphasis on the last word and Shūzō felt himself flush.

He wasn’t really sure why he was here, but even he didn’t think it was to actually talk to Haizaki. It was probably exactly what Haizaki thought. Shūzō’d come here to fuck. But now that he was here he had no idea what to do next. It was awkward and he didn’t feel it anymore. He was getting cold feet again.

“Yeah. About that. I…” Shūzō started. But this time it looked like Haizaki wasn’t going to let him back out. As Shūzō was talking he casually walked up, pushed Shūzō back against the wall and kissed him. It seemed to be a standard with Haizaki, this wall thing.

Haizaki’s mouth was hot and insistent on his. He put one hand in Shūzō’s hair, fingers gripping tightly at the strands. The other arm circled his waist as Haizaki pulled Shūzō closer into him. The kiss was rough, but not violent. It felt intense, like it was something Haizaki had really wanted to do, maybe for some time now. Shūzō had no problems with getting in the mood at all. He opened up for Haizaki’s tongue and moaned when Haizaki obliged him. He licked at Shūzō’s lips, his teeth, then put his toungue inside Shūzō’s mouth.

Their kisses got deeper and dirtier. Shūzō could feel strands of saliva stretching between their mouths every time they stopped for air. His lips were wet and swollen. He was gripping Haizaki’s hips tightly with both of his hands. Haizaki let go of his hair and tugged at Shūzō’s sweatshirt, took it off. He got back to kissing Shūzō, his toungue hot inside Shūzō’s mouth.

He put his hand up Shūzō’s t-shirt and Shūzō shivered. It felt really good to be caressed like that. Haizaki’s hands were like nothing else, rough and broad, and he knew exactly where to touch to make Shūzō moan. He hadn’t even known his nipples were this sensitive, or that pulling at them could leave him gasping.

Shūzō was hard, his jeans were actually hurting him they were so tight. He could feel Haizaki’s hard-on, too, but it was probably more comfortable for him in his sweatpants. Just when he was about to complain, Haizaki backed off and pulled Shūzō towards the bed.

The bed was a decent size, it could maybe even fit two people, though it’d be a really tight fit. Haizaki pushed him sideways on it, taking off Shūzō’s t-shirt along the way.

Then he kneeled down before Shūzō and Shūzō’s brain short-circuited. Haizaki pulled off Shūzō’s jeans, then his briefs. He spread Shūzō’s legs wide apart, his grip so tight under Shūzō’s bent knees that is was almost painful.

Even through the haze of arousal Shūzō couldn’t believe this. He’d never imagined he’d get blown by Haizaki. He hadn’t dared to even fantasize about it. But here Haizaki was, biting the inside of his thigh, mouthing at the skin, licking a path up. Shūzō had to watch this.

He propped himself on his elbows, with his head and shoulders resting against the wall. He felt Haizaki’s stubble on his skin. It was an amazing thing. It left Shūzō with goose bumps all over his body.

Haizaki buried his nose near Shūzō’s balls and breathed in, deep enough for Shūzō to hear it. He licked Shūzō’s balls, took them into his mouth, one after another. He still held on to Shūzō’s legs, gently, desperately, and Shūzō was so very glad he couldn’t see Haizaki’s face right then.

Shūzō didn’t really last through the actual blow job. Haizaki finally got to his dick, and it didn’t take long from there. He tried to warn Haizaki before he came, but he apparently didn’t mind swallowing because he didn’t take Shūzō’s dick out of his mouth until it was licked clean and so very sensitive even air hurt.

By then Shūzō could only sigh faintly, he was a total goner. He didn’t even react when Haizaki climbed into his lap and started jerking off. He could only watch, his eyes half-open.

Haizaki was actually kinda hot. He had a nice body, Shūzō supposed, although he couldn’t really see what was under his t-shirt. His face had this dangerous and wild look that some people went after. Shūzō wondered if he was popular. If he did this often. He looked amazing above Shūzō, his hand tight around his dick, the other a vice on Shūzō’s shoulder.

Haizaki’s hand was speeding up. He leaned in closer, touched his forehead to Shūzō’s, and, uttering a half-bitten off “Senpai” came all over Shūzō’s chest and stomach. Then he slumped forward with a sigh and buried his face in Shūzō’s neck. It wasn’t that uncomfortable, so Shūzō didn’t complain.

***

Shūzō wasn’t sure how long they lay there like that, but it was enough for the spunk on his stomach to start getting really gross. But even that didn’t make him want to move. It felt good, being so close to someone after sex. Shūzō didn’t really get that often. Haizaki’s breath was tickling his neck, in a pleasant kind of way.

Shūzō looked down to where Haizaki’s arm was circling his waist. “I told you not to call me senpai,” he grumbled half-heartedly. Haizaki huffed a weak laugh. “Not gonna happen,” he said and rolled off of Shūzō.

Shūzō regretted saying anything. He already missed the warmth of Haizaki’s body against his. But he definitely wasn’t asking for a cuddle. He wasn’t that far gone.

Haizaki reached under the bed and picked up a tissue box. He grabbed a few tissues and started cleaning up Shūzō’s stomach, then his chest. Shūzō felt embarrassed, but he was also drowsy and lazy, and it felt nice, if a little awkward. He wondered if this was some kind of gay after sex etiquette thing. You came on a guy, you cleaned him up. Or something. He didn’t really know.

Haizaki tossed the soiled tissues somewhere, hopefully into a garbage bin, and plopped back down on the bed, propping his back against the wall next to Shūzō’s head. His left arm brushed Shūzō’s shoulder and made his skin tingle.

Shūzō refused to do anything stupid. Instead of leaning into Haizaki he started looking around the apartment. It was okay, he had to admit. The bookshelves near the bed were full. There were rows of books, textbooks mostly, but also some novels. Neat stacks of magazines. A few manga titles lined up and organized on some of the shelves. It didn’t look like Haizaki at all. Or rather, not like the Haizaki Shūzō’d imagined.

Maybe Haizaki wasn’t living here alone. It was possible. There was only one bed, and it was a bit narrow for two people, but not tragically so. They could fit if they spooned really close. Maybe Haizaki slept here with his girlfriend. Or his _boyfriend_. Hell, did that even happen? Shūzō had no idea.

“You live here alone?” he asked cautiously, glancing at Haizaki. Haizaki’s eyes were closed. He didn’t open them as he replied “Huh? Oh. Yeah.” He didn’t elaborate, so Shūzō wasn’t sure if that meant he was single. Maybe he wasn’t. He’d been waiting for someone when Shūzō’d shown up, hadn’t he? Cooking for them, too. Was that someone still coming? Shūzō really didn’t want to be caught naked in Haizaki’s bed, with some of Haizaki’s spunk still crusted on his chest. Not by anyone, but especially not by Haizaki’s possible _boyfriend_.

Worse than naked, even. He was still wearing his socks. He had to look ridiculous.

Haizaki wasn’t much better. His come-stained t-shirt had ridden up a bit and his stomach was showing. His sweats were hanging around his ankles. It seemed he didn’t have any underwear on. _God_. No, the socks deal was definitely worse.

Shūzō took advantage of Haizaki’s still closed eyes and glanced up at his dick. It was completely soft now, wrinkled and plump. It looked so vulnerable lying there against Haizaki’s thigh, still wet with his come. Suddenly Shūzō had the weirdest urge to take it into his mouth. To lick at the skin, smooth out every wrinkle with his tongue, suck it until he coaxed it back to hardness, slowly, carefully.

Something clenched inside his chest. He had to get out of here. He got what he’d come for. This thing he was thinking right now, it was too much. For fuck’s sake, he wasn’t going to _suck Haizaki off_.

He scrambled off the bed and started putting on his clothes. He threw a look at Haizaki. He was sitting up and looking back at Shūzō, his expression unreadable.

When Shūzō buttoned up his jeans and was reaching for his t-shirt, Haizaki waived at the door near the bed and said “Bathroom’s through there if you wanna clean up better, or something.”

“No, thanks. I’d better get going. I’ll shower at home.” Shūzō tried to sound sure, but it came out weak. It was just, he really didn’t want to stay here any longer. He quickly threw on the t-shirt and went looking for his sweatshirt. Haizaki had thrown it somewhere during their move to the bed and now he couldn’t see it anywhere.

“Oh yeah. Get off and get out, my favourite, too,” the bitterness in Haizaki’s voice took Shūzō by surprise. He turned around. Haizaki’s mouth was twisted in a sneer. He quickly got off the bed and walked toward Shūzō. He had Shūzō’s sweatshirt in his hand.

“I hope you enjoyed our little _talk_ , Nijimura-senpai,” he drawled lazily, but the resentment was still evident in his voice. He threw the sweatshirt at Shūzō and turned towards the bathroom. His ass was bare and his sweats, still around one of his ankles, were trailing behind him as he went, but it didn’t seem to bother him in the least.

By the door he stopped and, without turning, added “Get your things and go, you know where the exit is.” Then he reached for the knob. He really was going to blow Shūzō off, just like that.

“Listen here, Haizaki.” He was damned if he let Haizaki blame this one on him.

“No!” Shūzō actually jumped at that. He’d never heard Haizaki sounding so angry. “No,” Haizaki repeated, quieter this time, but no less resentful. “I have no time for this bullshit. Get the fuck out, and shut the door behind you,” he snarled at Shūzō, and then went into the bathroom , slamming the door in his wake. Again. Shūzō was really getting tired of it.

He pulled on his sweatshirt and went to get his coat. He chose to ignore the uneasiness this whole exchange with Haizaki caused in his stomach. Like hell was he going to feel guilty over the fucker.

***

He tried to put the whole Haizaki thing out of his mind, but it didn’t let him. That weird uneasiness he’d felt then was coming back to him in waves. Why had Haizaki sounded the way he had when Shūzō’d tried to leave. It had been just a hook-up, hadn’t it? That was the whole point of it. To get off and part ways as soon as it was done.

So why was it that Shūzō’s gut insisted on something else. Because, just for a moment there, Shūzō had been almost sure that Haizaki’d sounded hurt. Like maybe he’d wanted Shūzō to stay. Which seemed ridiculous. But he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Not to mention that he was popping up boners left and right every time he remembered Haizaki and what he’d done to Shūzō that evening.

The thing that haunted his imagination the most, though, was the sight of Haizaki’s cock, laying soft and limp against his leg. Shūzō simply couldn’t stop fantasizing about what it would feel like in his mouth. Its length and heft as it grew harder on his tongue. The taste of Haizaki’s come. It was driving him crazy. Had he always been this gay, or had it been Haizaki, with his damn cursed dick, that caused this obsession? Not like it really mattered, Shūzō wasn’t getting over it any time soon.

After two weeks of doing nothing else but jerking off to the fantasies of blowing Haizaki, and worrying over the way he’d acted that evening, Shūzō came to a sudden and very unpleasant realization.

He was actually the hugest asshole in the history of human assholery. He’d been telling himself right from the start that he hadn’t ever really known Haizaki, but at the same time he’d already put a label on him. He had known Haizaki to be a troublesome delinquent with a penchant for violence. But that was years ago. He had thought it himself: who knew what Haizaki was like nowadays.

Maybe he wasn’t a guy who got off by beating people up and fucking random strangers and old acquaintances. Shūzō had just assumed, because Haizaki still looked like a gangster, still swore a lot, still got into fights. But he hadn’t even bothered to ask. Hell, they hadn’t even _talked_ properly, aside from a few snide comments and a bit more moaning.

It was terribly unfair of him. Especially since when he had gone crazy for a bit after his dad’s death, everybody had an excuse ready for him. When he had beaten up other people, come home covered in cuts and bruises, failed one exam or other. It was all okay, everybody had a justification for that. Shūzō had always gotten the benefit of the doubt, even when he hadn’t deserved it at all. But he himself had just assumed the worst of Haizaki, and had seen no need to question it, not the first time, and definitely not the second.

He still had no idea why Haizaki had kissed him that first night, but it was his own fault, he hadn’t bothered to ask. He had never made sure if a quick hook-up was what Haizaki had wanted.

Well, he had also had a small panic attack over the gay, but it was funny how unimportant that seemed right now, weighed against everything else. And sure, all of it was partially Haizaki’s fault, too, but it wasn’t like Shūzō had given him a chance to explain anything.

Yeah, so he was definitely going to get punched this time, but he felt terrible and he had to at least say he was sorry.

***

Shūzō didn’t let himself chicken out. He walked up to Haizaki’s door and knocked loudly without thinking. He really hoped Haizaki was home, because he wasn’t sure he could make himself come here again if he was out.

When the door started opening, he took a few steps back. Behind it Haizaki stood in only a pair of old boxers and a stretched tank top. He was scratching his stomach and blinking rapidly. It looked like he’d been sleeping. When he registered just who exactly was there standing on his doorstep, he quickly sobered up.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”he asked, scowling.

No small talk, good. Shūzō could absolutely do this. “I have to talk to you.” He hoped it would work.

“Oh, get fucking lost. I’m not in the mood today,” Haizaki sneered and turned to go back inside, “and I doubt I’ll ever be again, so don’t bother coming back,” he added viciously.

It didn’t look good, if he closed the door now, Shūzō wouldn’t probably get another chance. Wait, what? “What the hell do you mean, you won’t be in the mood again? To what, talk to me?”

“Talk to you, fuck you, whatever you wanna fucking call it. I’m serious, Nijimura, get lost or you’re gonna regret it.” Haizaki sounded really angry.

“What happened to ‘senpai’?” Shūzō asked. God, what was he, a preschooler?

But Haizaki didn’t rise up to the challenge. One moment he looked like he was gearing up for a fight, the next he was slumping against the open door, leaning on the doorknob.

He sounded resigned when he said “I’m serious. Fucking hell, just go away. I really don’t wanna talk to you,” and started closing the door.

But this time Shūzō wasn’t going to let him. “Wait. I really came here only to talk. Just. Give me five minutes. You can throw me out after.” Please, he thought. Please.

Haizaki looked unsure for a moment, but then said “Okay, talk then. You’ve got five minutes.”

Shūzō breathed out in relief. “Can we go inside? I’d prefer not to do this here.” Not in the corridor, where the whole building could hear what was going on.

“Yeah, whatever.” Haizaki opened the door wider to let Shūzō through. He closed it behind them after Shūzō went inside.

Shūzō didn’t know where to start. He needed a warm-up. “Were you sleeping just now?” he asked.

Haizaki rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I had a night shift, I was sleeping it off. You seriously wanna waste your time on goddamn small talk?”

He was right. Shūzō got to the point. “I came here to apologize. I behaved like a dick, sorry.”

Haizaki was unimpressed. “Okay. That’s it? If you wanna feel better, then fine, apology accepted. You didn’t even need five minutes. Now get lost.” He reached for the door again.

Shūzō wasn’t letting him blow him off. “No, that’s not all. I want to explain. I was a presumptuous asshole. I figured you were still like back in middle school, and I hadn’t bothered to check. I just assumed, when you kissed me back then, that you were looking for a quickie, and I jumped at the chance. But since I’d never done anything with a guy before, in the end I chickened out.”

“Well, you assumed wrong, then,” interupted Haizaki. Shūzō looked up at him, but he didn’t meet Shūzō’s eyes. He was looking at something on the wall, his head turned away.

“About the quickie,” he continued, “not the other things. You were right about those things. I’m still like I was back at Teikō. I’m just trying not to be a bit more, right now. For a time I even got worse. I really went off the rails in high school. Got kicked out in the end.” He shuffled his feet a bit, like he was embarrassed. “I got mixed up in some really bad shit a couple years back. Hell, I would probably be still doing that, but some guy got angry and tried to gut me. Put me in hospital for a few months. It kinda changed my perspective on some things.”

“What? You got stabbed?” Fucking hell. Shūzō definitely hadn’t imagined something like that. “How bad was it?” he asked.

Haizaki lifted up his tank top. There was an ugly, white line of raised and puckered skin on his right side, running from his ribs down toward his back. A few shorter ones beside it. It looked pretty serious.

But Haizaki said “It didn’t kill me, so not that bad. I suppose it helped that the guy had shitty aim, so the knife just skidded of my ribs and went into my side, not the stomach. The kidney’s a goner, but that’s what you got a spare for, right?”

He rubbed his eyes with his fists. Right then he looked so miserable Shūzō’s heart clenched. He wanted to do something to make it better. It didn’t even matter that it all happen years ago.

“Anyway. I had plenty of time in the hospital to think things over. Especially since I almost never had visitors. In the end the only person who came to see me was my old basketball captain, from my high school. He fucking hated me when I was on the team, but he’s a really good person, responsible and all that shit. He probably thought it was something he had to do to keep being a goody-two-shoes,” Haizaki mocked, but there was a small, fond smile on his face. “He dropped by a few times. And once he told me that, okay, it was my life to screw up as I liked. But maybe I should take this as a lesson. To finally stop sabotaging everything good I had going for me. He told me to stop doing the things and wanting the things I thought I was supposed to do and want. Nobody was going to live my life but me. He told me instead to try to get the things I actually wanted. Like, the ones that took a little work, but were still worth it.” He sighed and opened his mouth to say something more, but in the end he didn’t continue, just went to the bed and sat down. He looked tired.

Shūzō had never expected something like that. It made him feel like an even bigger asshole. He walked up closer to Haizaki and said “Sounds like a really smart guy, that Senpai of yours.”

Haizaki laughed weakly. “Yeah, I was cursed with having bossy and annoying Senpais who couldn’t mind their own business.”

“Oi, brat! Watch who you’re insulting.” Shūzō mock-protested.

Haizaki looked up at that. “Sorry, Senpai. Don’t kick me, please.” Shūzō started to laugh.

But then Haizaki turned away, and said, his voice serious, “That night I was actually trying to follow his advice, you know. To get the thing I actually wanted to have. Didn’t really work out, in the end.” Shūzō noticed Haizaki’s ears were red. His heart started to beat faster.

“What, you mean me?” He couldn’t believe what Haizaki was saying.

“Yeah.” Haizaki ground out, “Yes, you. I had the stupidest crush on you in middle school. It was fucking ridiculous. But you graduated and I got kicked out of the team. I didn’t see you for years. Then one night I get jumped by those assholes and you come in, like a fucking knight to the rescue, or something. But you don’t even remember me, damn.” Haizaki’s voice got quiet, “I guess I kissed you to fuck with you a bit, but also because I really wanted to. Never would’ve expected you to kiss me back, though.”

Shūzō was floored. Because, what? ”You’re telling me you kissed me because you had been pining after me ever since middle school and when you saw me again you couldn’t help yourself?”

That was apparently a wrong thing to ask. Haizaki’s head shot up and Shūzō saw that he was angry again.

“No, I was not pining, what the fuck,” he spat. “You know what, that’s enough. Your time’s up. You said what you had to say, now leave.” He gestured at the door.

Shūzō had screwed it up again. “Sorry, I wasn’t trying to make fun of you. Just, it’s a lot to wrap your head around.”

“Yeah, sure. Are you gonna go, or do you want me to help you?” Haizaki wasn’t convinced.

“Listen.” Shūzō refused to give up now. Not when he knew what was actually at stake. “You said it yourself. I kissed you back. I came to you again.”

“You just wanted to get off, have a little gay experiment, and I was a convenient dick.” Haizaki pointed out.

“What? No. Well, yes. But only because I thought that was all you wanted, too. I _told_ you. I stupidly assumed. I never asked. Back then I didn’t even know what _I_ wanted. I’m here to apologize, because I’m actually sorry.” Haizaki had to only believe him, that was all.

Shūzō came up to the bed and sat down next to him. Haizaki’s look was still skeptical. Shūzō hesitated for a moment, but then reached for Haizaki’s hand. He took it, laced their fingers together. He could feel how fast Haizaki’s heart was beating.

“Look. When I kissed you back then, and a second time here, I meant it. And I really want to do it again right now. Can I?” He asked, hoping he could finally get through.

Haizaki squeezed his hand. “Yeah,” was all he said. Shūzō didn’t need more.

He put his other hand on Haizaki’s head, turned it towards him and kissed him on the lips.

It was exactly like he’d remembered, only better. Their mouths moved together in an easy slide and just that was making him hard. He let go of Haizaki’s hand and put his arm around his neck instead. With that as leverage he climbed into Haizaki’s lap. Now the angle was better, and he could rub his cock on Haizaki’s stomach while they kissed. When he started to move, he felt Haizaki was hard, too, his dick a hot brand against Shūzō’s thigh.

They kissed like that for a while, rubbing each other, holding hands. When they stopped, Shūzō asked, “Do you have work tonight, too?”

“Yeah. Damn, yes, I do.” Haizaki answered.

“How long till you have to leave?”

“What time is it now?”

Shūzō looked down at his watch. “Around five.”

Haizaki squeezed his neck. “Okay, so we have four hours, more or less. Why?”

“Is that enough for me to suck you off?” Shūzō drawled.

Haizaki smirked and said “It depends on what kind of blow job it’s gonna be, but I’d say yes, definitely enough.”

Shūzō wasn’t convinced. “I don’t know. It’s going to be a pretty thorough one. I’d better get started.”

“In a minute,” Haizaki replied and pulled Shūzō down to kiss him some more.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is a lie.
> 
> All of you who managed to suffer through to the end - thank you so much for reading! Your noble sacrifice shall not be in vain!


End file.
